Brand new story! Kyle (@FallenMarvel) tells how porn addiction from an early age harmed him and his relationships. Please don’t forget to SHARE AND COMMENT! We will pass on a link to this post to Kyle so he can read your feedback.
PORNOGRAPHY ISN’T REAL AND THE PORN INDUSTRY PROFITS FROM PEOPLE’S MISERY
~ By Kyle J. (male, 28, Twitter, @FallenMarvel)
I was just like any other kid growing up. I was unfortunate to stumble upon “adult” videos at an early age, on top of becoming a socially awkward teen. I did not understand what I was looking at until I got older.
Since the age of thirteen, porn films were a part of my routine. I indulged in watching them almost on a daily basis. I always thought that I could stop whenever I wanted to. It wasn’t until I was around seventeen or eighteen when I tried to put an end to it, but it turned out to be a lot harder than I thought.
There were times when I would use my computer to do constructive things, but somehow I would always find myself at a porn website. I tried to tell myself to stop more times than I can count. There have often been times where I have lost sleep from watching porn scenes on the Internet late at night. Things weren’t going right in my life and I became dependent on watching porn to release stress, not knowing it was only adding to my stress. It really took away from the things I really enjoyed in life.
Watching porn films definitely skewed my image of what beauty is. It got to the point where I saw women who performed and I thought to myself, “Why is she doing this?” or, “She doesn’t seem like the type that should be doing this.” Subconsciously I didn’t want to see them doing the things that they were doing in those scenes. I was so “programmed” from watching porn that my body would always disagree with my mind. I couldn’t stop myself no matter how hard I tried to. I began to feel very low about myself for a long time because of it.
The last few years began to reveal how sex performers do exactly what they are paid to do: PERFORM! They are emotionless performances perpetuated as real sex. The act of sex is real in porn, but emotion is virtually nonexistent.
That’s how I began to feel. I was being drawn to something that was a complete fake and it made me feel the same way. I didn’t want to continue watching it, but I could never get the images out of my head. It kept pulling me back in.
I came close to losing my girlfriend of three years because of my dependency on porn. It does nothing for real life relationships. There is no connection watching porn. With the knowledge I have now about the “adult film” industry, it makes me sick to my stomach to know the things that those people have gone through, and that I contributed to it since I hit puberty.
It’s a degrading industry that profits from other people’s misery, and it’s all because the industry isn’t held accountable for its harmful effects. (And because people watching it create the demand for it.) Pro-porn advocates will very much say how it’s no different from being entertained by mainstream films, but I beg to differ. The images stay in your head for life.
I will never forget how watching porn made me feel. Some things I was fortunate enough to forget, but other things are stuck there until I become diagnosed with Alzheimer’s or amnesia.
Finding this site motivated me to share my story and feelings about what this billion dollar industry does to people. They make it seem so glamorous. Porn stars may gain a lot, but they lose a lot more. Of that I am certain. I only hope that my story can help someone else. If it does, then it is worth the effort.
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