Anti-Pornography Activist Blog -- by AntiPornography.org: MELANIE’S STORY: (Sex Shop Worker) “How Our ’Sex Society’ for Men Makes Me Have Serious Issues”

Thursday, May 16, 2013

MELANIE’S STORY: (Sex Shop Worker) “How Our ’Sex Society’ for Men Makes Me Have Serious Issues”

Please READ AND SHARE Melanie’s powerful story how working in a sex shop traumatized her and changed her view of men. (Sadly not for the better!) Please feel free to also comment!

NOTE: We will pass on a link to this post to Melanie so she can read any supportive comments you post.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HOW OUR “SEX SOCIETY” FOR MEN MAKES ME HAVE SERIOUS ISSUES

– By Melanie (22, Germany, found AntiPornography.org through YouTube)

Hey everyone. I’ve been working in an erotic store for about three years now and I must admit it is simply disgusting to see what kind of pornos men pick. (The name of the store is Erdbeermund, in case anyone is interested or lives in Germany.) The oldest men pick the teen movies, the younger the female performers the better, and the more brutal the sex acts the better. We have DVDs about men sewing up women’s vaginas and everything else you can imagine.

Working in this place has really made my image of men worse. Every second DVD customer wants us to throw away the DVD cover. Why? Because he has to hide what he is watching from his wife, girlfriend, or whoever. Sometimes we have customers asking for help to pick a nice sex toy to surprise their wife, and as soon as the customer steps up to the register he asks screwed up questions like: “Where is there a whorehouse or a strip club?” Or he even changes his mind on surprising his wife and ends up buying some DVD with men peeing on women.

We have porn addicted customers calling us all stirred up because they’re waiting for a new DVD that was supposed to come out. These people spend hundreds of euros on some stupid DVDs! They collect this stuff. This is sick! One of them lost his wife and has a lot of debt because of this!

As for me, I broke up with my fiancé because he was (I believe) a porn addict. He came to visit me from the US for two weeks and had nothing better to do than get up and watch porn while I was still sleeping. All he had eyes for was girls and more girls. He loved strip clubs and everything that had to do with this theme. This screwed up my love and respect for this man and he disgusted me. Plus he had double moral standards big time: For instance, he loved all these things but his own woman isn’t allowed to even take sexy pictures, and gay men should be killed but lesbians are hot. Since being with this man I feel like throwing up just thinking of men liking lesbians, men watching porn, or men going to strip clubs or whatever.

This man hurt me so much that now I truly have an issue just with seeing naked women everywhere. I got to the point that I started crying when I was watching TV or if I saw a commercial for the sex hot-lines or just some movie with women taking off their bras, whether it fits in the movie or not. And this is also the reason why I stopped modeling. It is because I see all of this differently now. I could have been big in hip-hop videos but I chose not to — because it’s just the same as pornography, just not to the same degree.

I want to escape from this but I can’t. I have a new boyfriend now and all of these issues I brought from my old relationship have really caused some issues already in my new one. I am simply disgusted by men. My boyfriend, who is a sweetheart, once told me that he has always dreamed of a threesome with two women, which is actually nothing really bad. But I’m so mad and disgusted just because of these things that I had to go through with my ex. I even thought about going to a psychologist.

All in all these things make me go crazy and this “sex society” that is made for men pisses me off big time. I cannot even go to a damn regular club without being forced to see female strippers hopping around in front of my boyfriend’s nose, and everyone always expects me to accept it: “Men are like this,” “It’s in their genes,” “You have to accept it,” Blah, blah, blah… Get out of my face with this!

Anyway, I am so glad that I’m not the only one with these kinds of issues. Most people don’t understand it. I love your site and I will try to spread it to anyone who seems open to it. Much respect to you and the anti-porn side! We need more like you!

STORY LINK:

http://www.antipornography.org/harm_stories.html#146715

READ MORE HARM STORIES:

http://www.antipornography.org/harm_stories.html

Please don’t forget to like, comment on and share this post to spread the word about the harms of pornography and the sex industry and to support the cause. Thanks!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Please support the cause by following us here at this blog, liking us at Facebook, subscribing to our YouTube channels, and following our Twitter accounts. Thanks! ~~

FACEBOOK PAGE: AntiPornography.org – Nonreligious, Pro Free Speech, Pro Healthy Sex & Love ~~ http://www.facebook.com/ENDSexploitation ~~

YOUTUBE CHANNELS: AntiPornographyBlog ~~ AntiPornographyOrg ~~ SayNOtoProstitution ~~ ENDSexTrafficDEMAND ~~ PornAddictionHelp ~~ SayNOtoSadomasochism ~~

TWITTER ACCOUNTS: @AntiPornography ~~ @ENDSexTraffic ~~ @ENDProstitution ~~ @NoSadomasochism ~~ @PornAddictHelp1 ~~ @HealthySexNLove ~~

Post created by AntiPornography.org Nonprofit Organization ~ Preventing and combating the devastating harms of pornography, prostitution, sex trafficking and sexual slavery, while supporting safe, healthy, equality-based sex, love, and relationships ~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

NOTE: To comment on this post please do not click on the "Add a comment" link above. Instead, if you're viewing this post on the main blog page, please click on the "# comments" link further down and to the right, next to the time of this post. Or, if you're viewing this post on its own page, please click on "Post a comment" below the tags of this post. Also, apologies for if there are any unclickable URLs in this post. They will be fixed as time allows. In the meantime, please feel free to just copy any unformatted link and then past it into a browser address bar and then hit ENTER, in order to get to the desired page. Thanks!

NOTE: There is no more of this post at the "Read more" link below. (If anyone knows how we can make sure that that link doesn't show up in any future posts, please let us know. Thanks!) Sorry about any confusion or inconvenience, and thank you for your patience and understanding while we work on resolving this technical issue and any others at this blog that need addressing.

No comments:

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)

CHECK OUT THIS EXCELLENT WEBSITE!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the most current information about the documented harms of pornography please visit the extremely informative new website Pornography Harms at PornHarms.com.

"Dedicated to providing the most accurate peer-reviewed research on the harm from pornography, along with relevant news and opinion."

This outstanding website comprehensively addresses the harms of pornography in regards to all of the following categories: addiction, brain science, children, cybersex, family, Internet, Internet safety, marriage, men, psychological, prostitution, relationships, research, self image, sex trafficking, sexting, sexual violence, societal, STDs, teens, and women.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**~~~~ HOT NEWS!! ~~~~** A GROUND-BREAKING new documentary about pornography has been released!

Please visit the website for
"The Price of Pleasure: Pornography, Sexuality and Relationships."
Lots of great info there, including many video clips, such as one of Noam Chomsky being interviewed on the issue of "choice" in regards to performer's participation in the porn industry. Or, you can see the whole film HERE right now at Media Education Foundation.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
******* HOT NEWS! The AMAZING and very eye-opening Stop Porn Culture video slideshow "Who Wants to Be a Porn Star?" is now once again available on the Internet! It exposes the true harsh reality of the porn industry and analyzes it with many profound and disturbing insights. To watch it right now click HERE.
For more information about Stop Porn Culture please check their MySpace page, their web site and their events page.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Enjoy! :-)

VIDEO INSTRUCTIONS. PLEASE READ!! (For sidebar videos only.)

NOTE: If the videos don't play for you, you either have JavaScript turned off or an old version of Macromedia's Flash Player. Click HERE to get the latest flash player.
If you would like to see a video in its original fuller screen format at Google Video or YouTube, click on the small title below the video screen. Then once you are at YouTube click on the "small rectangle in a bigger rectangle icon" at the bottom right of the screen. At Google, click on the "down arrow" icon at the bottom right of the screen, and then select "full screen". When finished viewing, press the "Esc" (Escape) key on your keyboard to exit. Thanks! :^)

Books about the harms of pornography

Pornified: How Pornography is Damaging Our Lives, Our Relationships and Our Families, by Pamela Paul. (Buy it here at Amazon.com.)
(Note: The author has stated that she regrets the errors on pg. 259 in the sentence beginning with “Meanwhile, women on the Left…”. The sentence and the points made in it are inaccurate but corrections were not able to be made for the paperback edition.)

Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture, by Ariel Levy. (Buy it here at Amazon.com.)

Pornography: Driving the Demand in International Sex Trafficking, by Captive Daughters Media. (Buy it here at Amazon.com, or at Xlibris here. Table of contents here. Full text of Introduction by David Guinn here.)

The Macho Paradox: Why Some Men Hurt Women and How All Men Can Help, by Jackson Katz. (Buy it here at Amazon.com)

Getting Off: Pornography and the End of Masculinity, by Robert Jensen. (Buy it here at Amazon.com.)

Not for Sale: Feminists Resisting Prostitution and Pornography, edited by Rebecca Whisnant and Christine Stark. (Buy it at Amazon.com here or at Spinifex press here.)

How to Make Love Like A Porn Star: A Cautionary Tale, by Jenna Jameson. (Buy it here at Amazon.com: ) It includes much valuable information about the pornography industry that makes it clear how harmful it is.

Against Pornography: The Evidence of Harm, by Diana Russell (Buy it at Amazon.com here or at Diana Russell's website here. Book info here.)

Dangerous Relationships: Pornography, Misogyny and Rape, by Diana Russell. (Buy it at Amazon.com here, or at Diana Russell's website here. Book info here.)

Pornography: The Production and Consumption of Inequality, by Gail Dines, Robert Jensen, and Ann Russo. (Buy it at Amazon.com here.)

Life and Death: Unapologetic Writings on the Continuing War Against Women, by Andrea Dworkin. (Buy it at Amazon.com here.)

"Making Violence Sexy: Feminist Views on Pornography", edited by Diana Russell. (Buy it at Amazon.com here or at Diana Russell's website here. Book info here.)

"Pornography in America: A Reference Handbook", by Joseph W. Slade. Buy it at Amazon.com here.

Traci Lords On the Oprah Show:

Traci grew up in an abusive home and was raped at the age of 10 by a neighborhood boy. Her career in the sex industry began when she ran away from home at age 15. She obtained a fake I.D. "mainly to get a job…as a waitress, just some sort of employment," Traci says. "I was really desperate."
When she answered an ad for a figure model in a local newspaper, she was quickly swept up into the porn industry. Nude modeling led to a centerfold in Penthouse, which quickly led to hard-core pornography.
"I had stars in my eyes," she recalls. "And I thought, 'Okay…maybe this is a way of having the attention and having everybody like me."
Battling her "self-loathing," Traci says turning to the porn industry was her way of getting attention.
"It wasn't about sex… it was about numbing out, finding a place to put that anger. I was very aggressive…it was vengeance… it was about attention."

Oprah Show: A Porn Star Gone Straight: The Traci Lords Story.

Family and Children Oriented Anti-Porn Internet Resources:

WhatAParentCanDo.com

CP80.org
(Internet Channel Initiative)

Enough is Enough

ProtectKids.com

Morality in Media

National Law Center

Victims of Pornography

Legal Information Regarding Pornography

Canadians Against Sexual Exploitation

United States Department of Justice Section on Pornography

Citizens Against Pornography

Maryland Coalition Against Pornography

Anti-Porn Network

The Social Costs of Pornography (2008 Princeton University project. 10 papers by different professionals. See right sidebar.)

Why the Government Should Care About Pornography. (2005 U.S. Senate Hearing) Please click on the following links of names for testimony by each individual: Pamela Paul, (author of "Pornified"),
Ms. Leslie Harris, (Executive Director Center for Democracy and Technology), Mr. Rodney Smolla, (Dean, University of Richmond School of Law), Richard Whidden, (Executive Director and Senior Council National Law Center for Children and Families), and Senator Orrin Hatch.

*******************

AntiPornography.org supports the CP80 Internet Pornography Solution that provides an option (for those who choose it) to protect children and others from pornography. Please click on the button below to find out more information or to learn how you can support it too.

Disclaimer:

Just because a person, group, organization, book, website, video, or resource, etc., is linked to or presented here on this blog, it does not mean that everything expressed or done by that person, group, etc., is personally supported by AntiPornography.org. (No anti-woman views or actions are supported, regardless if the source of them identifies as anti-pornography or not.) A wide variety of resources are provided here for visitors. It is up to each individual person to examine the resources for themselves, and to decide for themselves what information is useful to them or not, and who or what to support or not, based on what is right for each individual and where they are currently at in regards to their views and activism. We support someone taking what is useful for them from here and other resources, and then ignoring or leaving behind the rest. We share what diverse individuals and groups are doing to fight against the harms of pornography so that you can get ideas from others and then proceed to do your own activism as you choose, not necessarily to have you support or do exactly what others are doing. Also, if you have any concerns regarding the resources on this blog, please realize that this blog, its overall content, and the list of what a person can do about pornography are works in progress and subject to revision. (As the content is further examined and considered as time permits.) If you think something should be revised or removed, (because you feel it is anti-woman, or for some other valid reason), please feel free to respectfully comment and share your point of view on the matter.

Thank you for your patience and understanding in regards to all of the above. ~ AntiPornography.org

P.S. All videos in the sidebar of this blog and all news stories are automatically generated by key words. We do our best to set them up so that no inappropriate content will appear. However, it is not possible to completely control this. So please be understanding if you come across an inappropriate or offensive news story or video. Thanks!

Regarding"Fair Use"

To the best of our knowledge, the reproduction of any and all non-original content on this blog is both acceptable and legal per the "Fair Use" doctrine of United States copyright law. That law allows limited use of copyrighted material without requiring permission from the rights holders, such as use for scholarship or review. For more information, please see Wikipedia's "Fair Use" article, and the U.S. Copyright Office's website page on the "Fair Use" doctrine. If any copyright holders have any concerns regarding reproduction of their materials here, please contact me in the comments section of the relevant post, so that we can make whatever changes are necessary to respect your rights and wishes. Thank you! :-)